Did Jesus Walk His Way to the Valley of the Shadow of Death?

Unless you have been living under a holy rock, you must have heard about the latest JC scandal! I got to say, for a man that has been dead for one-hundred-million years, he can sure still cause quite the media hype!

Picture it, Jerusalem, 2007. There is a documentary being made by James Cameron. Oscar winner and Canadian! I’m the Drag King of the World! “The Lost Tomb of Jesus,” to air on the Discovery Channel on March 4th, is a documentary that claims to have found the two ancient stone boxes, which once held the remains on Jesus Christ Superstarr and Mary Bad-Gyal Magdalene.

At this time I caution you to have a brain and think whether the individual that brought you, “Titanic,” should have be given the right to produce anything that deals with a religious subject matter. I mean, what is next? George Lucas producing, “Attack of the Curry Clones, India’s Holy Temples?”

According to the documentary, in 1980, in a suburb of Jerusalem, 10 tombs were found that could possibly hold the family of Jesus, including Jesus himself and his faithful consort, Mary Magdalene (M & M). The filmmakers and the researchers that were involved in the making of the film are quite excited by this claim, however many academic and Christian scholars are skeptical. Ok, we all know Christian’s and academics are skeptical by nature, it is their job—refute, refute! But let us just think about this for a moment.

The very fact that Jesus had an ossuary would contradict the Christian belief that he was resurrected and ascended to heaven. Most Christians believe Jesus' body spent three days at the site of the Church of the Holy Sepulcher in Jerusalem's Old City. The burial site identified in Cameron's documentary is in a southern Jerusalem neighborhood nowhere near the church.


Oh my, we are on the verge on yet another Holy War about a dude that has been dead forever! HALAL! Has history not taught us anything, kids?

So according to the film, there is a inscription on one of the tombs that reads, “Judah, son of Jesus.” So not only did JC walk and die a mortal death, but he shagged as well!!?? What would mama say about that? It seems that Madonna Ciccone is the one only one that can have the word “immaculate” attached to her!

YOU WISH!

Toronto filmmaker, Simcha Jacobovici, who directed this film, believes that a name on one of the ossuaries -- "Mariamene" -- offers evidence that the tomb is that of Jesus and his family. In early Christian texts, "Mariamene" is the name of Mary Magdalene.

Whether skeptical or convulsing at the idea that you, a devout believer, may actually look upon the tomb where JC and M& M once laid, one fact remains. Jesus can make mad dolla dolla bills for just about anybody who wants to document or produce his story. I mean after being tortured by, “The Passion of the Christ,” by alchie and racist director, Mel Gibson, it is necessary for us to commodify religion any further? For GOD’S SAKE, they had a line of “Passion of the Christ” jewelry! Where is Martin Luther at, with his 95 Theses?

Either way, the Christian Church and the Pope have their holy knickers in a twisted exorcism, about this matter. But as well all can see, unlike JP II, this Pope is clearly a carnation of the anti-Christ, and this should cause us to be weary of a cover up conspiracy! A type of behavioral pattern that is not habitual from the Christiandom. As a beat of sweat drips down my forehead, ThunderpussGeisha strongly recommends a healthy paranoia, when it comes to institutionalized religion.

Who’s there? Who’s watching me? Stop it! Ok I think I am feeling JUDGED!

Does it really matter if this was where JC once rested his handsome head? Or where M & M did one last hot lap dance? NO! Faith is a personal journey of self-realization. Ultimately, it is hope. Hope that something exists beyond the realm of our own selfish and destructive nature.

But this is what is troublesome with religion when it gets narrowed into being taught and preached between four stall walls.Wake up people! You can not take religious texts and teaching literally.

So if Jesus really did once lay in that tomb, does that take away the power of faith and salvation he inspires in so many? NOOOOOOO! It takes away from mysticism that is created around the possible mythology of his ascent into the heavens.

So now I leave you on this note-- is to difficult for us to believe that an ordinary woman or man could endure what JC did, and be thought of as the Child of GODD(ess)?

I think, therefore I am.