Exit Only?

Attention ladies and gentlemen. I wish to tackle a topic of discussion that may make you feel a little un-comfortable. Side effects of this discussion may include:
Fainting, vomiting, feeling a particular relaxation or cringing in your backside, or simply-just reflections of good old times ():

If you haven’t guessed, fine I will tell you. ANAL SEX! Hooray! Love it or hate it, everyone should at least try it once. Imagine you had never tried ice cream?! What a tragedy that would be, no? YES!

I am not ashamed to admit it. I pine for anal sex, like Xscape did for “Understanding.” What is it about anal sex that I find most appealing, you inquire? You’re a nosey bugger! I can only speak from my experience. This is the wisdom I will share. Anal sex is a complete out of body (or bodily functions…hee hee) experience. Just plain “give it to me” styles can be taken in this submissive position. Anal sex makes you want to tie your tits in a knot and your pussy into a bow.

So from the general research that I have done on this “leaky” topic, I have made some concrete conclusions. Gay and straight men seem to enjoy anal sex more than then straight women. Lesbians like myself, well, we are just whores. Mouths, dildos, fingers, toes…anything goes. YAY! My god, I feel so exposed.

So I try and assure my straight sisters, there is a light at the end of their anuses. After talking to them and admitting my intense passion for the backdoor loving, they seem to look at me with wonder and offence. I just don’t understand, so I try too.

I believe one of the main problems of having heterosexual anal sex is this: the men want to shove their giant cocks in a female bung-hole, without any concern for the fact that your ass is about to expand to the size of a small country. I say slowly and gently to start. If you can’t take a penis is your ass, there are always fingers! Tell your man to stop being so “trigger happy,” and try to not just get off, but also get you off! Revelation. For after this gentle massaging of your toot-toot, maybe some licking (for advanced and dedicated ass lovers), maybe you will now be relaxed enough to get the dumb-stick shoved up there! Anal sex is all about mind over matter.

TADA!

Men, oh straight men. Stop being such pussy-holes. Take the mentality of versatility into consideration. Front and back action is where it is at! I myself, do not find fulfillment out of just being either aggressive or submissive, top or bottom. Grow in the sheets with your lover. Like any sexual act, the pleasure is always more satisfying when your lover is attentive to your needs and helps you to relax, when trying something new. Do not try anal sex with a stiff ass. It will hurt.

To all those who enjoy getting ass-ridden into the wee hours of the night, or early in the morn, CHEERS to you! To many more ass-rising experiences!