Monday, April 28, 2008

Case of the Fake Friend

Vanity diminishes your soul.
It leaves you to become a person with no deepness of emotion and no desire for anything other than falsified self-control.
Love yourself deeply, but not yourself alone.
I have changed, though it has been hard to let go of the things that hurt me.
Lovers, friends, attachments to things that are beyond my earthly control.

He once told me that I was his sensible rock, though now to him I am just a freak of nature with a hint of drama to shake and stir.
He claims that I will say that he just doesn't understand, but maybe it is because he just does not want to understand something that is different then the way that he thinks I should be.
I stood by his side when he needed me, for years I watched him battle the depression of a lover lost and to remind him that he was worthy of happiness.
When it came time for me to be weak, crumble at my own feet, he was quick to aid in my defeat and insensitively tell me that I am no longer as strong as I use to be.

Does he think me a fool? Does he not see that I am fighting for my dignity as he once did?
I do not need to be reminded that I am not as I once was. Neither is he. I use to love him like he was my brother.
I stood by his side and he treated me like an ordinary friend, when I was not that at all.
I am not someone who can be brushed aside and nor am I willing to play his games of keeping control.
One day he will realize the friend that you had in me, but it will be too late.
Another stranger in my Paradise.
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