Friday, August 31, 2007

My Star Trek Women

Yes, I am a Star Trek nerd. Judge me if you must, but I am willing to admit it. So my deep fascination with Star Trek and my odd, yet slightly kinky-perverse attraction to the women of Star Trek got me thinking. What is it about these alien-babes that makes my warp core omit a tackion pulse, which then leads to an un-authorized launch out of my cargo bay?

For the sake on my sanity and preference, I am going to stick to futuristic foxy ladies of Star Trek: the Next Generation and Voyager. Welcome to my Nerdom!

Counselor Deanna Troi

I sense she is a hot lay. I always had a thing for the TNG Batazoid. I like that she sensed things and could feel things intensely. She always knew when they were in trouble...though usually after they had been shot at! I wonder if she could feel that it wasn't Riker between her thighs (her Imzadi!), when she was bangin' his accidentally created, DNA twin brother!? You get your play DT! Deanna Troi had some hot tits and a nice ass for a white girl. There must be some credit given to the fact that she had to wear the "no-rank/no-repect" uniform for many seasons. But man, her sket-arella outfits, made me one happy nerd (0:

Lt. Tasha Yar

Fuck the blob monster! She was taken too soon and too young! Then we had to be haunted by images of her, through her DNA twin, evil, Romulan Empire collaborating, hot sister. I had a appreciation of this hot security officer. Why you ask? I shall tell you. There is something about a woman and a phaser gun, combined with a light spanking that made me wake up inside. Her hair flirted with my early “lesbionic” fantasies of dykes. That was some serious dyke hair. Throw me in the brig! PUNISH ME, Tasha Yar! Gone to soon.

Ensign Ro

Who cares about her first name. Again, clearly another dyke and a naughty Maquee, with rebel Bijoran blood too! This is a package of wholesome-wickedness! I liked her firm attitude (dykeyness) and her "oh so tribal" earring. One sided...(too dykie). She was clearly a power-top and she would give it you with mad strap-on styles, or until you could not bare anymore. I just liked her pure stankness and her indifference to everyone. Word up.

Anyka Hansen (7 of 9)

Hot, hot, hot, hot. In many of my visions I have dreamt of being smothered by her breasts into a content, yet unconscious state. That outfit was pure porn for the future. Yeah baby! Her hot, mono-tone voice, banging body and “inability to comprehend foolish human sentiment” made her the cream of the crop. Half human, half borg. Amen. I love you 7.

Luteniant B’Lanna Torres

Wanted: Hot Klingon that likes to bite. I can always appreciate some biting. She was the kind of girl that would smack you down if you messed with her. Is this a bad thing?? That is for you to decide, you perverse sodomite! Clearly, the make-up sex would be the bomb with this half human/half Klingon woman of fire! BT had a hard Klingon exterior and a soft warm, human insides. Uh hum. She just needed hugs and most of the women I know. But her can do attitude and her smart talk as ships Engineer made her hot to handle. Congrats, Tom Paris, for making her into your baby mama!

Honourable Mentions:

The Hot Klingon Sisters: Lursa and B’Tor

Now we are talking--hot tata's all up in my face! Pass me a glass of blood wine. Pure duttyness, these Duras Sisters! Imagine getting tag teamed by this pair? They had a fighting spirit and a scent for the sexy time! I like them cause they emanated sex appeal is some foreign, and grotesque way. A session with these ladies would lead to a few black eyes, a sore ass and a locked jaw. That could be one of the best nights of my life.

Doctor Beverly Crusher

I did not really want to shag her, but she had cool hair and a fierce attitude! She forgave Jean-Luc for sending dear hubby, Jack away on the away mission that killed him. That is inner peace people! Her ability to rock her turquoise coloured doctor coat was always enduring to me. Her denial that her son, Wesley, was a flaming homo made me want to send her to sick bay to have a scan done on her brain. Like, hello!! However, our BC did possess a impeccable bedside manner. Respect, BC.

Commander Tepal, from Star Trek: Enterprise

Hot. Just hot. One hellz of a sexy, non-emotional woman. Again, I have known many, but she is the ideal.

The Borg Queen
The hottest and baddest, real bitch I know. You handle that collective and show them who is boss! Oh mama! I just can’t help it. I like the way she flirts with her strive for perfection and total annihilation of knowledge and culture. Don’t stand in her way, or she will assimilate your irrelevant and imperfect, human ass!
I need a woman like that.

Now I am going to go play video games, masturbate to porn and fuck a blow up doll.
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