Wednesday, February 7, 2007

Let's Get it On in PUBLIC: Even Venus Got Blown

Oh Daddy, don't you wanna be my soldier?? (Kelis, you a sexy beast) What is with the thrill of having a good shag in public?? Could it be the insatiable thrill of being caught or seen? maybe heard? Or is it just because as humans, that is what we do...WE FUCK??!! Either way, I loves me some sex in public.

For those who are just straight out horny, some wackin off or fingerin is recommended. For those sly mo fo's who want to take it to the next level of naughtyness, oral sex can be finger lickin good! And for those who are jsust dirty dirty, a little exit only action can lead to some backhall BLOP BLOPS! Privacy is so passe--that is an institution for the blane, weak of heart and well...B-O-R-I-N-G!

The fact of the matter remains, everyone should try it. JUST DO IT and DO IT WELL!!

Here are my recommendations on where to boink in the great outdoors. To get you started *W*

1) Movie theatre: Lord knows when they turn off the lights, the fun can begin. Begin with some light patting. OH MY! Some dirty eye contact that says "I see you watching me and I know you want it...but it depends on how you kick your game!" TLC--this is essential! Kids, it does not get much better than a slushie (or know who you are!!) and a nice wet spot in forming at the bottom of your pants. GOOD TIMES.
2) Intermisson at a Show: Under the assumption that you are attending a production that has either got you mentally stimualted or physically aroused, why not take that and make some good use out of it. The sensation of "rushing" on a performance and then performing yourself on someone is absolutley delicious. Don't always be greedy...please and you shall recieve compensation when you enter the realm of the afterlife--good karma comes to those who are charitable and giving. GIVE GIVE GIVE it to them! When the orchestra strikes back up, or the annoying sounds warns you that the show is about to begin again--finish that job! Don't forget to swallow!
3) Against a tree--and/or in the park: Now this is pure instinctual. MAN make fire! Oh maybe that would work back in the days of the caveman...but honey, I would rather just a bomb diggity orgasm. Tease me, till I loose control! Something about having your ass up in the air (Jesus, I am revealing myself to be a promoter to sodomy quite freely!) and the wind blowing against your lucious bosoms. This is also a great place for you to show your power in the making sexy. Be easy, submit yourself to pleasure and vice versa. And don't forget to be safe and have fun!

Ok, so enough about that raw, layin it down gangstarr shit styles. ThunderpussGeisha...focus.

There is always the sheer joy of when you is feeling someones flow and knowing that you desire to please them anytime and anywhere. Now that is really SEXY. Don't be shy kiddos! Lovin is made to give, unless you En Vogue, then you ain't neva gonna get it. I suppose what all this leads back to is this. Enjoy it! Be naughty and nice and, if you have someone around that inspires you to feel da dee...DO IT!! If Venus came out of her shell to get blown, so should you! After all ladies, you are a GODDESS!

I will leave you with this interesting fact...about gay men (in case I have offended them by not calling them GODS--or wait, GODDESSES--I am confuzed):

Public sex is far from a new phenomenon among homosexuals. 15th century Florence was like the San Francisco of Renaissance Italy. Its pederasty subculture was so out of hand that the Uffiziali di Notte (Officers of the Night) court was formed to prosecute sodomites. St. Bernardino of Siena described the sodomites thus during 1424-1427: “the ‘wild pigs’ had special meeting places at special times of the night, and congregated at taverns, pastry shops and barber shops (barbers often acted as pimps).” Some of the locations where boys could be picked included Borgo Santo Apostolo, Calimala Francesca, and Il Tetto de’Pisani. Three-fourths of the men arrested in Florence between 1478-1483 in the age range 19-70 years were unmarried, and some of these men were arrested repeatedly. Too much gay sexin it seems--in da public!


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